Ren McCormack for City Council: I'd never heard of the Alcohol Beverage Advisory Group before, but doesn't it sound absolutely kick-ass? Unfortunately, its name is deceptive, just like the American Center for Wildlife Conservation Policy, a conservative think-tank advocating for anti-Mexican eugenics programs. It's all trickery. Ideally, the Alcohol Beverage Advisory Group would consist of Jimmy Buffett, Vince Vaughn, David Lee Roth and most of the people that I work with, including two Jen Chens.
However, the reality is that the board consists of "12 members of the community" and "the manager of Regulated Industries Division," otherwise known as the Division most likely to push for the adoption of race-based eugenics programs due to sheer sociopathic misanthropy.
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I think I heard that they made dancing illegal, too. Anyway. They're meeting to discuss the "proposed ordinance changes" by which they make the city's fun more grudgingly administered.
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