Dear Flying Spaghetti Monster

A tale of love, loss and pasta, by Jared Karol

Dear Flying Spaghetti Monster,
I am writing this letter to thank you for saving my son with the celestial touch of your noodly appendage. Since you are the creator of the universe and the master of all beings, you already know my son’s story. It is worth repeating if for no other reason than to give you the true recognition you deserve.

Seeing as you don’t have hands or fingers, you may have trouble opening this letter. I hope the inconvenience does not cause delays in your saving of other people.

For several months upon first eating solid foods, my son gobbled pasta like it was the best food on earth. Which, as you know, it is. He was indiscriminate with his pasta tastes. He scarfed down spaghetti, ravioli, egg noodles and anything else made of dough and flour. He even ate play dough, thinking it was uncooked pasta I’m sure. It was evident he was in touch with his inner noodle.

Then one day my son stopped eating noodles. Just like that. At the sight of noodles he screamed and pushed his plate away. As a man who has been a lifelong member of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster and a devoted Pastafarian, this behavior was extremely troubling to me. No matter how I tried to coax and persuade him, he would not eat his noodles. I began to doubt my abilities as a father. I openly wondered if there was something I had done to upset Your Noodliness.

In my confusion and distress, I feared for my son and for what might happen to him for abandoning the values of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.

I was worried about how Your Noodliness would perceive our family now that our son had lost touch with his inner noodle, and had gone down a wayward path toward death and destruction.
Of course, had I been of a clearer mind, I would have realized that I had no need to worry.

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Sometimes the popularity of the Flying Spaghetti Monster will be explained to you by one who loves his noodley appendages:

i believe in the flying spaghetti monster

i'd like to share my new found freedom with "ramen" the flying spaghetti monster

And sometimes it won't:

The "Church" of the Flying Spaghetti Monster Explained
GOD -> MAN -> SOUTH PARK -> Flying Spaghetti Monster -> FSM Religion
Trace it back to its Creator!
To "Pastafarians":
They exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshiped and served CREATED THINGS rather than the Creator--who is forever praised. Amen. - Roman 1:25
THE FLYING SPAGHETTI IDOL
Know more about
IDOLATRY AND FALSE "GODS"
- THE PRAYER MOCKERY -
Our saucer which art in a colander, draining be Your noodles. Thy noodle come, Thy meatballness be done on earth, as it is meaty in heaven. Give us this day our daily sauce, and forgive us our lack of piracy, as we pirate and smuggle against those who lack piracy with us. And lead us not into vegetarianism, but deliver us from non-red meat sauce. For thine is the colander, the noodle, and the sauce, forever and ever. Ramen.