New Orleans will elect a new mayor on April 22, 2010, and the Brad Pitt for Mayor Campaign Steering Committee is asking you to vote for Brad Pitt.
After extensive polling, focus group discussions and soul searching, the steering committee, headed by Tulane's Dr. Thomas M. Bayer, decided upon thirteen reasons why the Crescent City would be best served with Brad Pitt as Mayor.
Reason #1 - He's Qualified
Rather than having to make vague and unpersuasive connections between clearly unrelated qualifications such as, say, franchise executive and governing abilities, the qualifications of our candidate are plainly obvious: as the worldwide audience of Homer's Troy can attest, Mr. Brad Pitt clearly has the stomach for the job, not to mention the shoulders to carry the burden of governance.
Reason #2 - NOLA ♥'s Brad Pitt
By bestowing the great office of Mayor of our city upon Mr. Pitt, we, the citizens, are afforded the opportunity to say thanks for the many wonderful things this gentleman has already done for us. What better way to show our heart-felt appreciation than to present to him the mayoral office, the patronage trough, the cornucopia of our great city, that which we hold so dear and is ours to bequeath?
Reason #3 - Lagniappe
If we elect Brad Pitt mayor, Angelina Jolie would be the First Lady of New Orleans.
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