'The F- It List'

Dick Cheney and George Bush star as two disgraced and declining Republican conservatives who decide to break out of the White House and live their last days to the fullest in director Karl Rove's tragicomic road movie. Dick Cheney is a corporate billionaire who is currently sharing the White House with a failed, bicycle riding, frat brat George Bush. Though initially, the pair seems to have nothing in common as they approach the end of eight years of political humiliation, they both realize that they have a long list of powers that they would still like to abuse before being driven out of office. Realizing that the power of the White House may be their last chance to accomplish their most selfish desires, the two come up with a "F- It" list of things that they would like to do to "f- over" their friends, family, critics, and the White House's incoming occupant. The "F- It" list includes playing chicken with the entire US economy, throwing thousands more soldiers to needless deaths, and ultimately pushing "that big red button on the end of my desk that I'm never supposed to push".

The two men, one terminally ill, and one terminally stupid, take up drinking again, reinvigorate their forced friendship of eight years and live a lifetime of debauchery in their last remaining days.

 

On a bet, the two then decide to go skydiving. George's father had once bailed out from a downed fighter in World War II. Both men seek to justify their reasons in life for avoiding active military duty, and affirm the type of men that they really are.

One of Dick's regrets in life was in never having the courage to get "inked". The two visit a DC tattoo parlor which has been cordoned off and secured for the occasion. Dick gets the logo of his corporation Halliburton tattooed onto his arm, and George has a daggered heart with the name Condi on it tattooed on his buttocks.

 

Dick begins to treat George like the son he never had and tries to teach him all about hunting. One by one, all of the animals in the National Zoo are released and the two pick them off with rifles. White House dinners feature exotic dishes for the remainder of their term.

The big ending comes when George, acting on a drunken double dare from Dick, finally pushes a mysterious button in his office, unleashing nuclear holocaust in a preemptive foray into Pakistan.

The F- It List ends on 01/20/09.

 

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